That's No Bull
by Red Witch
Summary: Another day of riding the range with the Galaxy Rangers. Their life isn't all glamour you know?


**A herd of wild bulls have run off with the disclaimer saying that I don't own any Galaxy Ranger characters. Another mad one shot that's run out of my head trying to run down any little bit of sanity I can think of. **

**That's No Bull**

"Why is it whenever we pick up a distress call my uniform needs to be dry cleaned?" Doc moaned as he looked at his boots. "And I need to buy new **boots?**"

"Doc the freighter was attacked by the Black Hole Gang that was trying to rustle cattle again," Niko snapped at him as they rode their robo steeds, trying to herd the rather large cattle. "And it crash landed on Prairie. We have to get these Vulcanian Cattle under control!"

"MOOOOOOOOOOO!" The red cows with several horns bellowed. They also belched fire as they mooed.

"You would think that a space freighter transporting extra strong cattle with flamethrowers in their mouths would have stronger hulls," Shane remarked. "But I guess not."

"First we get those stupid genetically modified cows from the Bovo corporation," Doc moaned. "Then those ghost cows from another dimension and now alien **fire** **breathing** bulls! Where **exactly **in the Galaxy Ranger handbook does it say that we are responsible for **livestock?**"

"When they are extremely dangerous and stampeding towards a town!" Shane pointed ahead.

"**Of course** they would head towards a town!" Doc said sarcastically. "Why bother roaming towards a nice peaceful **empty** field with plenty of grass when you can trample the locals?"

"You know Zach he's got a point," Shane remarked. "We do seem to get more than our share of weird cattle than we should."

"We are space cowboys," Zach said. "Technically."

"We're **Galaxy Rangers!** Not cowboys!" Doc said. "I'm a computer doctor! The only thing I'm supposed to rustle up are some bad viruses! My momma didn't raise her little ranger to smell like a barnyard!"

"Just try to turn the leaders!" Zach fired up his thunderbolt. "This oughta spook 'em!"

"Yeah Zach fry me up a steak medium rare," Doc quipped as he rode.

"I'm just going to shoot in front of them in order to spook them!" Zach snapped.

ZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP!

Unfortunately the thunderbolt accidentally hit the lead bull. Even worse, the bull didn't seem affected by it. "Is it my imagination or did that charge make that thing stronger?" Shane yelled.

"It's not," Doc groaned. "It figures! Why can't the Black Hole Gang rustle up some **bunny rabbits** or something cute, small and sweet tempered? But nooooo! They had to go for the nasty flame throwing bulls!"

Then one bull shot out a blast of flame right at Doc. "AAAHHH! I've heard of red hot steaks but this is ridiculous!"

"I guess it's up to me then!" Shane rode along side the lead bull and pressed his badge. He then leapt from Triton and grabbed onto the bull's horns. His bio-defenses activated and he turned into a flaming beast monster. He wrestled the bull away from the town and into another direction.

Right into a nearby lake. "Of course! How else do you cool off a fire breathing bull?" Doc grinned. "Way to go my Gooseman!"

"Its working!" Niko called out as the cattle started to slow down and go into the lake. "They're running out of steam!"

"No, they're making steam!" Zach waved his hand in front of his face as the heat from the cattle collided with the coolness of the lake. "Really smelly steam…"

"Oh the smell!" Niko gasped.

"Well at least we stopped them from stampeding," Shane trudged out of the lake, soaking wet.

SPLAT!

"Oh great!" Shane groaned when he saw what he stepped in.

"Gooseman your feet are going to stink worse than usual!" Doc held his nose.

"It's not just my feet!" Shane snapped. "This steam is getting into our clothes!"

"Ugh I am going to have to take a dozen showers to get this smell out of my hair!" Niko groaned.

"Nobody ever said the life of a Galaxy Ranger was going to be easy or glamorous," Zach winced. "However I could have done with a warning about the smell."

"Why I am sorry I became a Galaxy Ranger Reason Number Seventy Five," Doc moaned. "Ew! Make that seventy five through **eighty!"**


End file.
